Naked Sushi Night

Tonight was “Sushi Night” at the Ranch. After an endless drone of rice and beans, beans and rice and the occasional beany rice, sushi night was a refreshing change. Some fellow ranchers had brought back sticky rice from the coast and we had rationed some salmon especially for the occasion. Everything was set for a fantastic evening of culinary delights. However, us newbies we were in for a much bigger treat.

Tonight, I learned of and experienced the true “Sushi Night,” which here at the ranch really means “(Naked) Sushi Night,” just not as widely publicized. As per tradition, the cooks strip down to a singular apron, hopefully covering the essential parts. They cook rice, roll rolls and fry tempura, all the while stark naked. I walked into the kitchen to see a fellow intern dancing to rap, stirring some rice, and wearing nothing more than a flowery apron barely covering their naked loins. Nothing like a full moon and some jiggle to really whet the appetite.

We decorated the table with giant banana leaves, in which the bounty of sushi was laid. Soon adventuresome diners had followed suit, resulting in a long table full of bare arses. What a beautiful sight. The dinner was amazing; the sushi being incredible after a long drawl of rice and beans. Tonight was different. Rice yes. But instead of beans, we got so much more! Aye! Dios mio!